NGOs and the Unintended Consequences of Women's Empowerment
By Moqheeta Mehboob
In her latest article, Ms Moqheeta Mehboob, an active participant in social development activities, reflects on a troubling trend she's observed: despite decades of dedicated work by NGOs and other organizations, many communities are seeing a decline in the effectiveness of these efforts. She delves into the unintended consequences of a singular focus on women's empowerment, highlighting how this has led to rising male dependency, increased family strain, and an imbalance in societal roles. Through her observations and experiences, she shares critical insights into why traditional approaches may be falling short and offers thoughtful, balanced solutions. Her proposed strategies aim to foster a more equitable and sustainable model of empowerment, emphasizing the need for both men and women to rise together for true societal progress.
NGOs have been working tirelessly for decades to uplift the economic and social values of communities. However, despite these efforts, many societies seem to be sliding further into poverty and dysfunction, rather than rising out of it. Why do families remain trapped at the poverty line generation after generation? Why does the son of an abusive father often grow up to become an abusive adult? These critical questions raise concerns about whether NGOs are addressing the root causes of social problems—or perhaps inadvertently contributing to their persistence.
The wave of women’s empowerment, which began in the West decades ago, has since spread globally. However, the meaning of empowerment has changed over time. A century ago, women’s empowerment had a different, more family-centric connotation. It was about being a strong mother who raised a stronger generation, and men took full responsibility for the financial and social stability of the household. If a father became incapable due to illness or old age, the sons naturally stepped up to shoulder that burden. Women, on the other hand, worked on the bigger mission—shaping the future by raising the next generation.
Sadly, over time, some segments of society (often vocal activists demanding more rights) felt that this crucial role of shaping the future wasn't "big" enough. Instead, they sought validation through monetary gains and titles, pushing for roles that offered immediate gratification rather than the long-term societal impact of family building. This shift in focus has had far-reaching consequences.
Having worked for over two decades with various NGOs in both India and the UK, I have observed a common pattern: in the push to empower women, men have been left with a sense of license to remain inactive and dependent. This is a natural human response—if someone else is doing all the work, the urgency to step up diminishes. The mindset becomes, "Since you're doing a great job, why don't you carry on?" This is precisely what has unfolded in many communities. Women are encouraged to take courses, assume leadership roles, and tackle challenges with immense support, which can appear like a win-win for the men in the household.
Several studies and reports highlight a concerning trend regarding the drop in male employment, education, and increasing dependency, particularly in relation to the focus on women's empowerment.
The famous economist and gender specialist, Michael Kimmel, once stated, "Sustainable development requires both men and women to rise together. Focusing on one while neglecting the other creates a social imbalance." And that is exactly what we are experiencing across the nation. It has become all too easy for men to coast through life, leaving the burden of sustaining the family, covering basic needs, and even funding vices such as alcohol and medical expenses on women. If a woman refuses to carry this burden, she faces abuse and harsh comparisons to other women deemed more "supportive" of their husbands.
Sadly, this role reversal has been accepted across all levels of society. Among the elite, women are expected to balance household responsibilities alongside a demanding career, with the justification that a high-society lifestyle requires both. Meanwhile, in lower socioeconomic strata, the situation is often compounded by addiction and abuse. Across the board, "women’s empowerment" has tragically become synonymous with earning money and gaining titles, while the core issues of support and shared responsibility remain unaddressed.
The unintended consequences of NGOs' singular focus on women’s empowerment are creating complex societal problems:
1. Increase in Male Suicides: There has been a concerning rise in male suicides, attributed to diminished self-esteem and a sense of purposelessness as traditional roles are undermined. Dr. Warren Farrell, author of The Boy Crisis, rightly pointed out, "The empowerment of women should not come at the expense of men's sense of worth and contribution." Many men, feeling left out of the empowerment narrative, are struggling with their identity and mental health.
2. Rise in Divorce Rates: Women, initially believing in the promise of empowerment as a path to liberation, often find themselves overburdened by the dual roles of career and household responsibilities. This can lead to growing resentment and eventually, higher divorce rates.
3. Bitterness Among Women: While empowerment promises independence, many women feel disillusioned by the reality of taking on excessive responsibilities, both professionally and domestically. This shift is causing a growing bitterness among women who feel overburdened and unsupported.
4. Normalization of Role Reversal: The current generation is witnessing a shift in traditional gender roles, leading boys to assume that their future wives will take on the primary financial responsibility. This mindset diminishes their drive to pursue education and careers, further perpetuating dependency.
5. Reluctance Among Young Women to Marry: As the burden of responsibility increases, many young women are opting to delay or avoid marriage altogether. They are unwilling to take on the dual roles of supporting both a spouse and children, leading to a generational shift in attitudes towards marriage.
Based on my observations and understanding, I have formulated several proposed solutions to address the misinterpretation of women's empowerment. These solutions aim to create a more balanced approach to societal issues by focusing on collective growth for both men and women. I'm confident that if we work together, we can reverse the current misunderstanding of empowerment and pave the way for a more equitable society. Here's how:
1. Encouraging Male Engagement: NGOs should prioritize and actively develop workshops aimed at men, focusing on life skills, emotional intelligence, and the importance of shared responsibilities. These workshops would help men understand the evolving dynamics of family and society, fostering a sense of responsibility and leadership. Empowerment programs for men are crucial in helping them contribute meaningfully to their families and communities.
2. Targeting Young Minds: Working with boys from a young age in schools and colleges is essential. Boys need to be exposed to social issues and understand their role in addressing these challenges. Empowering young men with the right values will encourage them to take an active role in societal change rather than depending on others to lead.
3. Redefining Empowerment for Girls: Educating girls on the true essence of women’s empowerment is important. It’s not solely about stepping into traditionally male roles or working outside the home. True empowerment also means embracing and honoring the critical role women play in raising future generations. Creating a balanced narrative can prevent misunderstandings and the unhealthy overburdening of women in society.
4. Strengthening Family Structures: Society and NGOs should implement more programs that stress the importance of raising a strong generation. Mothers need the right support systems, time, health, and environment to succeed in this mission. Empowering women to raise healthy, responsible, and capable children is a critical aspect of national growth and must be integrated into every initiative aimed at family upliftment.
By adopting these measures, NGOs and society can collectively work toward a more balanced and sustainable model of empowerment, ensuring that both men and women grow together without leaving one behind.
"When you empower women, you empower generations. But in sidelining men, you risk creating dependency instead of growth." – Anonymous Social Commentator
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